


White Chrysanthemum

by noeone



Category: Golden Child (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, Fluff and Angst, M/M, mentioned another member
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-17
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-04-01 12:58:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13998840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noeone/pseuds/noeone
Summary: Sungyoon clenched his fists, he just need to put this flower then his task was done, but his heart didn’t allow him. If he put the flower, meaning he said goodbye, he didn’t want to do that, he wasn’t ready.He would never ready to say goodbye.Among so many flowers in this world, why I give this flower to you? – Choi Sungyoon





	White Chrysanthemum

**Author's Note:**

> Italic = flashback,  
> please bear with my grammar mistakes.  
> hope you enjoy it~

One step, two step, another step.

 Sungyoon counted his steps in silent, trying to hold his tears that ready to burst anytime. He put his head down this whole time as if those marble tiles really interesting than the entire crowd around him. He stopped walking when camera lights attack him as his manager leads him inside the hallway. There’s so many cameras with furious click sounds engulfing him, and he kinda hope that many actually his fansite master. But his hope crushed into pieces as expected, none of them were his fans, they’re reporter who want to get hot scoop from him, digging his miserable fate into news.

Lining the hall way were large wreathes made of flowers positioned outside each door. The actual evidence that proofed this nightmare was real. Many sent the wreath in order to show their condolences.

Sungyoon froze when a woman gave him white flower, a flower that he didn’t want to touch, even more to give it to someone. His manager patted his shoulder, trying to give him some strength. Sungyoon bit his lower lip; put his cold straight face before taking another step.

157 steps,

Sungyoon took hundred steps from the car until this sorrowful room. His manager walked ahead, bowed deeply to everyone inside before put that white flower beside other thousands in altar.

158 steps,

159…

“Why are you here?!”

Sungyoon flinched; someone grabbed his shoulder, hard, hurting him. He lifted his head and found Lee Sungyeol in his vision. The warm brother-like eyes vanished from Sungyeol’s eyes, just hatred, sad, and mourn left on there.

He didn’t even blink; his eyes keep following Sungyeol’s moves in silent. He didn’t bug from his current position, even when Sungyeol strangled him, pulling his collar with one swift. He actually waited Sungyeol to hit him, to choke him, or hurt him. He wouldn’t even care if Sungyeol kill him too.

“Lee Sungyeol!!!”

Sungyoon could sense everyone fear as they pulling him away from Sungyeol’s clutch. He saw Myungsoo and Woohyun tried to push Sungyeol backward, each of them holding Sungyeol’s hand, suppressing the giant Lee’s anger who cursing loud. He also heard Sunggyu speak up to calm the situation.

In other hand, Joochan and Jibeom shielded him from Sungyeol, protecting him although that action was unnecessary. He’s willing to get hit.

“Are you okay, hyung?” asked Joochan, worries clearly patched on his face.

Sungyoon nodded, he wasn’t uttering a single word. He didn’t need his voice when person who loved it already left. He signaled Joochan to move, he needs to continue his step, to place this white flower in his hand on altar.

160 steps…

“Stop it, Sungyeol! Calm down!” Woohyun shouted when Sungyeol attempted to attack Sungyoon again. Everyone struggled to take down furious Sungyeol.

161 steps…

****golden child****

_“Choi Sungyoon?”_

_Sungyoon jolted up, startled when someone calling his full name. He lifted his head to see someone stood up in front of him, the handsome guy with a snapback. He abruptly stood up, bowing deeply to whoever the guy was but must be important. A staff who leaded him to this room said one of old trainees will meet him there._

_“Yes…I’m Choi Sungyoon”_

_“I’m Lee Daeyeol, your new team mates. Hope we’ll get along”_

_His eyes met with a warm smile from a guy who introduced himself as Lee Daeyeol. Sungyoon must admit this person was handsome and charming, his smile looks so cute and adorable although his sharp jaw made him so manly and mature._

_“I’ll show you around, come on”_

_Sungyoon’s breath hitched when Daeyeol grabbed his hand without warning. It felt weird when a completely stranger touched him, they just knew each other name a second ago._

_Daeyeol showed him their practice room, the studio, management room, their CEO’s front door as they can’t enter without permission and many more. He also introduced him to other trainees too before heading to company dorm._

_In the end of day, Sungyoon realized he had this certain feeling for attractive guy he just met today. His new friend._

****golden child****

_Sungyoon’s smile widened when someone dragged his hand to this corner of small room, away from all eyes and cameras. He never been this trilled when someone pinned him against the wall, tilting his chin up so his gaze drawn to beautiful eyes above him._

_His lips met with soft plump lips he always loved. It’s almost two years since their debut as group, and finally they got their deserved award. Sungyoon closed his eyes, savoring every minute when their lips connected._

_Sungyoon’s fluttered open as his lover ended their kissing session. He breathed heavily; cheeks were flushed with the tint of red as shyness creeping up._

_“Daeyeol-hyung…”_

_Sungyoon couldn’t even speak properly when another kiss landed on his lips, nibbling it hungrily. It’s not their first kiss but Sungyoon always got this mini heart attack when his lover intimated with him. His hands roamed around Daeyeol’s chest and neck; want to feel every friction he could get._

_“I love you” said Daeyeol with honey in his eyes, parted their kiss before smiling genuinely to Sungyoon._

_As much as they wanted to continue their activity, they needed to come back, back to their group, back to their fans, back as public figure because they still inside the TV station’s building where the ceremony award being held. They couldn’t take any risk._

_But Sungyoon knew, after this day ended, he’ll have Daeyeol for himself._

****golden child****

_“Can you not? Seriously hyung, it’s our anniversary!” Sungyoon snapped when Daeyeol busy packing his belonging, the elder got another schedule for variety show and required to be away from home._

_“You know I can’t be egoist and asked for another day, Sungyoon. Please understand” Daeyeol repeated the same answer hundredth times when Sungyoon keep pestering him about his sudden schedules._

_“Sure if you told me days ago! But you just told me this morning! What’s with this unexpected schedule? Can they send another member? Jangjun can go!”_

_Sungyoon crossed his arms in front of his chest, fuming._

_“They requested me, and company said yes.” Daeyeol stopped his activity, pulling his bad mood lover to his embrace, kissing the pout away. “I’m sorry to disappoint you; I’ll make it up later, okay, bunny?”_

_Sungyoon sighed but nodding in the end, work always comes first._

****golden child****

Sungyoon never knew since when they drifting apart and getting mad every time they met. He and Daeyeol used to be close like spoon and chopstick. People called them old married couple because they seem understand each other so well.

They were good before, they rarely fight, they understand each other, they compromise with everything, they complement their bad thing, and they also had good sex. Nothing’s wrong with their relationship.

He nibbled his bottom lip; his hands trembled badly as he suppressed his tears to drop.

****golden child****

_Sungyoon slouched over dining table with dejected face, his hair just a few centimeters away from plates of dishes he cooked for his lover. He waited his lover to comeback from his busy schedules but at 02.26 am there’s no trace of Daeyeol in their love house. Yesterday was Daeyeol’s birthday; he planned to have romantic dinner, celebrate the big day together but the main character not even showing up._

_It’s always been like that; he almost never saw Daeyeol’s face this past year after their group became famous. The leader had so many gigs, from variety show, MC and drama while he just occasionally went to variety show, sometimes musical._

_Daeyeol had many charms, Sungyoon admitted that. There’s many proposal came to the leader as he always delivered good entertain for public, mesmerizes the nation with his witty and funny self. Daeyeol somehow like jack of all trades, surely have many talents._

_Sungyoon realized he had to understand Daeyeol’s position, but his ego and loneliness always crept up to destroy his faith. He just wanted a calm day together with Daeyeol, a domestic activity in their house, just the two of them._

_But his dreams became an impossible thing as every morning he got Daeyeol bid him a goodbye and left the house after planting a sloppy kiss to his lips._

****golden child****

_“Can you spare me a little, Sungyoon-ah?”_

_Sungyoon scoffed, shaking his head before threw his body to the mattress, another day with childish argument. He was tired with this unsolved problem but he couldn’t hold back anymore._

_“Hyung! How many times do you think we ever see each other apart from group activities? You never look at me, damn it!” Sungyoon snapped for the umpteenth times today.  “And now I saw my lover’s face all over social media and trended everywhere”_

_“Sungyoon-ah..”_

_“Don’t give me that look; you know the reason behind my rage.”_

_Daeyeol stood up from his seat, approaching the sulky bunny, crawling to their bed. He caressed Sungyoon’s cheeks, but the later swatted his hand away._

_“I told you, I won’t ever cheat on you, he’s friend.”_

_“A friend? Are you sure? I saw many article related to you and him in every platform” Sungyoon pissed off, he still remembered clearly the intimate pose between Daeyeol and his colleague, the newcomer who also stared in same drama production._

_“I’m sorry if I look too close to him, I’ll stay away from now on.” Daeyeol sighed in defeat. “please, I want to spend my time with you, not arguing”_

_Sungyoon clicked his tongue, he wanted to stay angry at his lover, but spending the time together with Daeyeol was a rare chance, he couldn’t miss it. Finally the company gave Daeyeol three days to rest also to avoid another scandal._

_“Thank you, baby” Daeyeol smiled widely when Sungyoon opened his arms widely as signal that he wanted to cuddle. He leaned closer, giving a soft peck on Sungyoon’s forehead._

_“I love you, please lessen your schedules.” Sungyoon pouted as he snuggled closer, burying his nose against his boyfriend’s chest. They cuddled on the bed as Daeyeol shifted comfortably, they was planning to watch movie._

_“I try, I’ll speak to company about it, okay baby?”_

****golden child****

_“He got another schedule?”_

_Sungyoon grunted as he copped the poor carrots brutally, behind him, Jangjun sat leisurely on dining table while scrolling his gadget. The younger didn’t even realize that his question ignited an irritated feeling on Sungyoon’s chest._

_“He told me that he’ll take fewer jobs but the company really does shit”_

_Sungyoon jabbed his knife on potato before facing Jangjun, his hands on waist. He invited the group members to come over as he grew lonely. From ten people on their group, just five people managed to come._

_And as the first person who came, Jangjun really succeed to ruin Sungyoon’s mood with just one question._

_“They really milked out Daeyeol-hyung, huh?”_

_“What do you expect from our company? They snatched my boyfriend but I can’t do much to prevent that, shit!”_

_Sungyoon can’t help to curse, it’s not one or two times his company pushed Daeyeol to accept job until he never had time to rest. Sungyoon worried the latter would collapse soon or later. The other side effect was Sungyoon always got no chance to be with Daeyeol in daily basis._

_“Calm down hyung, let have fun with the others!” Jangjun finally lifted his head from his phone. “Seungmin and Youngtaek will come shortly.”_

_Sungyoon nodded, he must focus on his intention to have fun with the others, to mend his loneliness. He wanted to spread his wings and enjoyed his whole life even without Daeyeol around him._

****golden child****

_Sungyoon breathed heavily as his lips parted with another pair of lips he just kissed a moment ago. He looked at the eyes of a man in front of him, the same man who kissed him this past three months._

_He gasped as his partner ran the fingers on his skin, giving the ticklish feeling that he craved for more. He needed every soft touch against his body to please his urge. His heart beating so fast and steady under the incredible kiss._

_“Daeyeol-hyung got another schedule?”_

_“Yes, I don’t think he will come home till next week” Sungyoon sighed tiredly. “Jangjun-ah, can you stop mentioning him right now?”_

_It was bothering Sungyoon every time Jangjun’s mouth rolled the name of Lee Daeyeol, there’s a big hole in Sungyoon’s chest when he heard that certain name._

_“Sorry, sorry” Jangjun chuckled then cupped the elder’s cheeks softly. He leaned in to share another kiss with Sungyoon._

_Sungyoon whispered inaudible apology between the kiss, an apology for his lover. As much as he hated the fact he cheating behind Daeyeol’s back, he hated being alone and lonely more. He didn't know how this forbidden relationship started, he also didn't have any idea since when, but he's glad. At least, in the end, he has Jangjun to fill  his empty heart with some hot love and giving him bunch of attention._

****golden child****

“Why you choose to left without a word?”

Sungyoon closed his eyes, imagining the scene where Daeyeol looked at him with hatred eyes, the time when the elder left their house hurriedly as if he didn’t want to see Sungyoon’s face ever again.

He remembered how Daeyeol’s face turned hard as brick, the disappointed clearly plastered on there, a face that Sungyoon won’t ever able to forget.

****golden child****

_Low moans and whimpers filled the room, caused by soft touches which roaming Sungyoon’s skin. His nails dug into his partner’s shoulder, his sweats dripping down. He was lying on his bed with a man hovering above him._

_“Lee Jangju…”_

_A loud groans almost escaped from Sungyoon’s mouth but stopped midway when his eyes met with Daeyeol’s. The elder just stood still with very cold eyes, he clenched his jaw hardly, and his lips pressed together as a flat thin line._

_“Daeyeol-hyung!”_

_Sungyoon pushed Jangjun away from his body, clumsily jumping down the bed in attempt to stop Daeyeol._ _He hadn’t expected things to end up this way._ _Things between them hadn’t been very happy lately, but he didn’t want to let Daeyeol go._

_“Daeyeol-hyung! Stop! Let me explain!”_

_Before Sungyoon could reach the door and give an explanation, Daeyeol was gone, slamming the door along the way._

_“Hyung…”_

_Sungyoon turned over and found Jangjun standing awkwardly behind him. They shared unidentified stare, busy to understand this whole messy situation._

_“Just go for now, Jangjun… I’m sorry...”_

****golden child****

The crying sound engulfed the whole room; none of them believe their beloved left them early because of the tragic accident. Sungyoon could see Donghyun cried his eyes out in Jaehyun and Seungmin’s embrace. Bomin looks so lifeless, while Youngtaek’s eyes so red and puffy. He didn't found Jangjun anywhere but he understand the reason, without doubt, they're the culprit behind the incident. The main reason why everyone gathered at this room.

It’s wrecked Sungyoon’s heart when he saw how empty Jaeseok’s eyes were. He wanted Park Jaeseok to curse him, hit him or anything but silent.  He’s waiting Mr. and Mrs. Lee to slap him till his cheeks red, but nothing comes too. He believed world already knew the cunning side of him, everyone must know about his affair.

Yesterday, the leader of Golden Child has died following a single vehicle crash.  The news was shocking the entire nation. Daeyeol was killed when his car crashed the tree on street and he was pronounced dead at the scene. 

162 steps...

163 steps...

164...

Sungyoon stopped in his track, his gaze darting toward the photograph above the sea of white flowers, the picture of his love, his universe, his everything. In the center of the almost empty room there was a framed picture surrounded by white Chrysanthemum flowers and candles on a table.

He clutched his chest, there’s no warm feeling anymore, but something heavy that made him gasp out in pain. He took another step, his eyes attached on the picture of beautiful man with the warmest smile he ever found. He reached out his hand, a tremble hand that holding the white flower this whole time.

 “Why you didn’t curse me? Slap me?”

 “Why you don’t let me say sorry?”

“Why you keep that bad thing as your last memory?”

Sungyoon mumbled against his enraged breathe, the heavy feeling eating up his body, made him gasp out in pain from each intake of air. He wanted to cry. Every time bad scenes flashed on his mind, he wanted to end his own life too.

“Why good people like you left early? At least, curse me before you go, punish me, spit on me, or kick me hard”

Sungyoon felt his energy drained from his body, he already lost his desire to keep living. He tucked his lips, forming what he intended to be a smile.

“At least, let me say proper goodbye to you...”

Meticulously, Sungyoon gave a proper bow to show his condolence, he did his moves delicately, giving his all; he wanted to deliver the best. For the last time, he wanted to respect his lover.

****golden child****

“Choi Sungyoon!”

Sungyoon turned his heels around, meeting with cold eyes owned by Sungyeol, the elder looked calmer than before. he stared at Sungyeol intensively, he could feel his heart throbbing in pain; Sungyeol’s voice really reminded him of Daeyeol, the soft voice which always said nice things to him, praising him, caring him.

His hands reflex to catch a black velvet box from Sungyeol who threw it toward him. He lifted his head to see Sungyeol with confused expression.

“May God bless you and Jangjun.” Sungyeol clenched his hands before saying his next line “Thank you for say good bye to Daeyeol”

Sungyoon was choked by his own tears as he opened the box, there’s a pair of rings inside. Beautiful rings with DY&SY letters engraved in there.

“Probably Jangjun can provide you happiness more than Daeyeol. So, be happy” Sungyeol finished his words in tears, Myungsoo hurriedly pulling him to his hug, letting the eldest Yeol brother crying hard.

Sungyoon flopped down to the ground with loud crash, his legs lost their energy.  “Hyung… I am sorry… sorry…” chanted Sungyoon in his wail. He hit his chest repeatedly, tried his best to died down his cry but nothing succeeds. He drowned into self-blaming, regretting his past action.

****golden child****

You're so bright and warm like a sunflower,

So innocence and pure like a daisy

So loveable but strong like a rose

Many flowers are suit you, but in the end,

I give you this white flower.

White Chrysanthemum

****fin****

**Author's Note:**

> tell me about your opinion~


End file.
